Being a teenage girl is hard, but being a Mormon teenage girl is harder: A review of Beeson’s EP, ‘Ritual’
Released late last year, Beeson’s six-song project, Ritual reflects on the deconstruction of her teenage Mormon upbringing, with her objective being to “write cool songs that [she thinks] are weird.”
A lyrical sensation that allows small pockets of people a place where they’ll feel completely listened to, Ritual centres around three core themes much like the rest of Beeson’s discography: femininity, friendship and religion.
The first track, Gap Teeth, serves as a bridge, allowing listeners a direct insight into Beeson’s quiet longing of missing her 13-year-old “carefree and slightly ugly” self. The song centres however, around the idea of Beeson missing her younger body, indicative of her more personal struggles of body image and distorted eating of which she has spoken about in recent interviews; “about 13, I never looked so lovely.”
The beginning of the song feels slightly lighter, a gentle introduction to Beeson’s inner dialogue. The bridge however, is where her comment, “if you haven’t struggled with these things before, you’re going to think it’s a song just about being 13” can be clearly understood. The electric guitar underscoring the bridge alludes to the frustration felt by so many girls setting themselves unrealistic realities that seem so desirable to someone aware that “I know you’re worried it’s bad / I know I’m fading to black” but still ultimately believe that struggling is worth the belief that “I never looked so lovely.”
While Gap Teeth explores the universal and ever-present issue of body image for young girls, be prepared to feel as though Beeson has stepped into the mind of every teenage girl yet again with Swimmer.
Branded by Beeson herself as “a song about someone who liked me a little, but not a lot,” she dives deep into the murky waters of vulnerability, singing “I could love you baby, but I don’t have the time.” Giving her audience a song that feels like a story with its digestible lyrics following a chronological account of her experience, there’s good enough reason to believe that Beeson’s craving of “I wanna be a big star, is that such a crime” is indefinitely becoming a reality. The immersive experience of Swimmer with its eclectic mix of background drumming and electric guitar underscoring the chorus leaves listeners escaping down a rabbit hole as they practically feel the sensitivity created through the clever lyricism.
“A pop song about going to church and feeling scared about it” is a straightforward explanation for the project’s fourth and titular song, Ritual. A track which feels the most authentic yet, Beeson begins to uncover her internal battles with religion creating a slightly darker “hymn” of her own, exploring the mind of a young girl feeling out of place somewhere she is expected to fit into with ease. Her discomfort is revealed through the slightly angrier music underscoring the chorus, “I keep so soft and sweet, headlight stare walking in the building” while her vocals stay light and bright throughout, subtly hinting at the complexities of her feelings.
If you thought that ‘light and bright’ would be the theme that followed through, think again. Beeson’s indie-rock roots come to the surface In her next song, Pulpit, stripping back any niceties and creating a stage for the singer to explore her feelings of anger towards a religion so distant from herself yet so close to everyone else around her. It is this song that is home to one of Beeson’s personal favourite lyrics ‘I’m not a vessel not your hands or your body, so sentimental so haunted’ perfectly showcasing her growth and ability to reflect on feeling so trapped once upon a time.
As if the EP couldn’t reach a higher standard, the final song Keeping Score ties in everything Beeson feels so strongly towards in a perfect parcel. Her most vulnerable and touching yet, breaks away from the electric guitar, settling for acoustic instead, adding to its raw and realness, leaving anyone listening both fed and emotionally destroyed. It becomes ultimately clear that the difficulties of a Mormon upbringing worked simultaneously with the difficulties of her girlhood, if not enhancing them. “I’m a should’ve been son of a western wave”, “I could get really skinny maybe then he would try really hard” and “Have you tried just to pray?” are just some of her gut wrenching lyrics that force you to feel and leave you wanting to know more and hear more of Beeson’s wonderful work.
In fact, earlier this year, Beeson released an extended version of the project titled Ritual EP (Deluxe). Featuring the additional track, Forever as well as remixes and bedroom versions of three other tracks, fans can enjoy the extended EP on Spotify:
To catch Beeson live, make sure to check out her full list of upcoming shows touring in support of fellow indie artists THE DREGGS and Will Harford: